Fantastic!

I woke up this morning in the absolute best mood. I was slightly exhausted because I'd spent the past couple of days cooking and cleaning in order to host a Pampered Chef party (last night) but still in a wonderful mood. I didn't much think about the why, which made me wonder. Why is it we feel the need to dissect the reasons for a crummy, crappy, melancholy, lonely, angry mood but never bother to do the same for a spectacular mood? Is it simply that we're so damn grateful for it that we don't want to look at it too closely? Like we are afraid if we examine it it will disappear? Is it that we fear if we question why we are happy we will no longer be happy?
I don't know the answer, but I do have some answers as to why I'm so happy today. I have contributed. In the last few days I have felt that my words, my actions, my very existence have somehow brought joy to someone else. I have felt that I am not just standing, hands held out, waiting for someone else to give me a piece of themselves. No, I have reached out to give a piece of myself to others and in so doing, have brought them some measure of peace.
In thinking about this it was as if a light bulb went off in my head. For years there have been moments of joy and happiness but not necessarily large chunks of it. For years I have been watching life and waiting for something fantabulous to happen. It has been years since I have made a true effort to give of myself to those who may need me. Or not me, but somebody. I'm not talking about zipping out and volunteering. No, I am talking about asking an acquaintance if they are okay and offering a shoulder or an ear if they should need it. I'm talking about offering to run an errand for a harried friend. I'm talking about looking beyond my little bubble and offering a little compassion to the people I brush up against in my day to day life.
There was a time when giving of my time and resources (not money but personality strengths) was second nature. I didn't think about these things; I simply did them. I simply was them. All of that has been so long ago that I forgot what sort of personal peace it brings. The last few days have caused me to realize that I will not be truly happy if I don't reclaim that missing part of my personality. I am choosing to step outside my comfort zone, my cozy rut, my insane self absorption to be a blessing in other people's lives.